Inner Space
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A Crystallization of Thought, Experience and Psychological Concepts.
"A Negative Loop" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. A Negative Loop is a Digital Collage which scrabbles and strives to break free from the tyranny of its own internal self critic. Automatic Negative Thoughts are very common and may arise unbidden into our minds at any time. They can sound like a broken record stuck in a loop, with the harsh and repetitious lyrics of self-recrimination landing blow after blow, sapping energy, confidence and self-esteem. In our own inner worlds we may speak to ourselves in a most brutal way, a way in which we would never dream of speaking to somebody else. We may beat ourselves up over simple mistakes, blame ourselves for not meeting unrealistic expectations, catastrophize about the future and tell ourselves that nothing will ever work out, so why even try?
Fortunately through awareness, self-compassion, affirmation of our positive traits, being kind to ourselves, being realistic about how much we can take on and by letting ourselves off the hook sometimes; it is well within our power to shift our focus and to change that broken negative record. We can re-pattern our habitual thinking, searching out a smooth new track which moves in time with the rhythm of our lives and emphasizes the positive aspects of our own personalities and existence; freeing us from Automatic Negative Thinking.
"Rigid Defended Formations" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. Rigid Defended Formations is a Digital Collage which hunkers down in the inner trenches, bunkers and protected psychological spaces that we have constructed in our earlier life. All Ego Defence Mechanisms are an attempt at reducing tensions and anxieties through need displacement or perceptual distortion. They have all been at one time or other useful self-defensive strategies, organically formed in response to the psychological, social and emotional pressures of our developmental environment. Rationalization, Denial, Compensation, Projection, Identification and Fantasy are just some of the defensive strategies deployed to protect ourselves from psychological stress and emotional damage in earlier life.
As we grow older these defences which were once so useful, are so ingrained in our unconscious behaviours and attitudes that they are automatically and reflexively employed in situations, relationships and contexts where they have no place. In fact they can have a negative impact distancing us from reality while creating a rigidity and inflexibility in adult life that means an individual may unconsciously guard themselves against exploring positive new experiences, blocking the potential for maturation and growth. Having said that these defences are a natural and powerful resource in times of trauma or duress and the issue is not with the defences themselves but, given their unconscious and reflexive nature a lack of choice. By developing an awareness of how we utilize our various defences we gain an understanding of where in our lives they are useful or where they pose obstacles. With this awareness in hand and when the timing is right, we can choose to finally, simply step out of our own way.
"Resonant Empathy" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part Of The Inner Space Series. Resonant Empathy is a Digital Collage which reverberates like a tuning fork with the experiences of another and chimes a deeply resonant note within. Empathy is a natural capacity we share that enables us to feel into and understand the pains, trials, tribulations and joys of our common humanity. We get to the heart of a matter by opening up, listening attentively and picking up that which occurs in each other; as well as in the space between us. By practicing Empathy we learn to lay aside our own prejudices, predilections and agendas in service of entering into the lived experiences of another person, stepping into their shoes and seeing the world from their eyes.
When we meet at this deeper level, we reach out and bridge the gaps between one and other; We can form powerful bonds, erode isolation and gain new insights, whilst providing sustenance and support to those around us. By really taking in the experiences of others, the act of empathy changes us; like a chemical reaction the interaction alters both parties, promoting growth, and deepening understanding of other people, of our own self, of how we relate, of the nature of meaning in our lives, and of the brilliance and burdens of the existences that we share.
"Blistering Corrosive Shame" (2019) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. Blistering Corrosive Shame is a Digital Collage which carries at its heart the deep sense that it is flawed, unacceptable, unlovable and wrong. Guilt and Shame are different emotions; they can occur together and are often confused. Guilt is a feeling we get when we recognise that something that we have done through our actions, behaviours or words has been inappropriate, hurtful and potentially damaging to ourselves or others. Although it can be an uncomfortable experience, when Guilt is healthy and proportionate it is a prosocial emotion, providing us with an internal map that helps us define healthy boundaries in relationship to others. We experience Guilt when we cross a line, and by recognising when healthy guilty feelings occur we have an opportunity to correct course and apologise where needed. We learn from and use our experiences of Guilt to develop our individual sense of right and wrong, as well as to inform and intuit the appropriate contexts in which future behaviours will be received and accepted.
While Guilt applies to our actions, Shame is a beast of a different nature. Shame is the feeling we have when we experience our own selves as somehow broken, rotten, corrupted, not good enough or lesser than… A chronic sense of Shame is usually instilled during early childhood relationships when we are neglected, unaccepted, or harshly reprimanded by caregivers who continuously emphasized that the fault lay with our own self, as opposed to in our actions; The seeds of Shame are also planted in households where physical abuse (hitting and slapping) and/or emotional abuse (name calling, coercion and bullying) were prevalent.
Chronic Shame can be carried throughout an entire life and is seriously damaging. A pernicious sense of being tainted, bad and wrong may colour all experiences and contribute to self-loathing forms of Depression. Chronic Shame can lead a person to hide away from life, avoiding risks and opportunities. The chronically shamed may also have trouble with love, they may feel like an imposter, be unwilling to be vulnerable, and may falsely anticipate that their partners will leave when they discover who they really are. Chronic Shame can also be the driving force behind those individuals who run themselves into the ground by constantly striving, working and achieving in a forever war to fill their own void of “never good enough”. No doubt about it Shame is heavy stuff.
"Good And Angry" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. Good And Angry is a Digital Collage borne on a wave of fire and fury arising from within. Anger is a powerful and potentially explosive emotion which can be uncomfortable to encounter within ourselves and in others. Unfortunately Social, Cultural and Familial values and attitudes tend to frame Anger in a very negative light. On an individual level when these values are absorbed and internalised, we can start to lose touch with our Anger as being a natural and healthy emotion occurring within the body and may no longer accept it. Once we deny our Anger we cede our responsibility for it, block its healthy expression and it remains stuck within us. When Anger is stuck it manifests as bodily tensions and stresses resulting in fatigue, restlessness, irritability and over time as illness. Repressed Anger also finds unintended paths to release, such as passive aggression, manipulation and outright destructive/self-destructive behaviours.
On the other hand when we develop a healthy relationship with our Anger, accepting and taking responsibility for it, we gain control over it, expressing it directly, openly and fairly. It allows us to assert ourselves, set healthy boundaries, remove ourselves from unhealthy situations and to recognise the times when our Anger may be unhelpful, so we can then simply and safely put it down. GAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGHHHH!!!
"Promethean Dreams" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. Promethean Dreams is a Digital Collage that hangs, carefully suspended, within the visionary borderland that exists between waking life and a deep restful slumber. At the end of a day our brain cycles down from the higher frequency Gamma and Beta brainwaves associated with focus, cognition and learning, arriving at the slower, deeper frequencies of Alpha, Theta and Delta. These frequencies are associated with relaxation, contemplation, creativity, emotional connection and serve as a gateway to that great hinterland of sleep.
There are three points upon entering (Hypnagogia), during (R.E.M/Dreaming) and leaving (Hypnopompia) sleep, when the unconscious and conscious mind become luminous to one another. In these borderland states people may often hear beautiful unfamiliar music, experience hallucinations and some may even pluck out some form of divine and elusive inspiration. Like stealing fire from the gods suddenly they awake holding the solution to an otherwise intractable problem.
The great inventor Thomas Edison actively cultivated and explored the Hypnogogic state to germinate new ideas. The chemist Dmitri Mendeleev struggled for many years to grasp how the chemical elements combined and interacted and then on February 17th 1869, he fell asleep frustrated and exhausted in his quest. What came to him in sleeping was a profound understanding of how electrons and valences work together in an elegant dance, the foundations were laid for the Periodic Table and Modern Chemistry was born. Many others sleep with their notebooks and instruments close to hand, waiting for that moment of inspiration to strike.
"Fertile Minds" (2017) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Fertile Minds is a Digital Collage which tends to the garden of Creativity which blooms within a playful and inquisitive mind. The human mind is capable absorbing an almost infinite array of information, experiences, concepts, thoughts and emotions and has the remarkable ability weave even the most irreconcilable of these through the loom of self producing new and unique patterns and perceptions. This perpetual dance of absorption, integration, recombination and expression forms the foundations of Creativity. The quality of Creativity is shared by us all and it promotes personal resilience, flexibility, confidence, true expression of the self and novel approaches to the trials of life. It is a deep process taking a myriad of forms and it continues throughout our entire lives. It is the wellspring of art, science, literature and growth.
"A Growing Tendency" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. A Growing Tendency is a Digital Collage which firmly sets its roots deep into the rich soil of The Self, before using what it finds there to grow outwards towards the realization of its full potential. The concept of a Self-Actualizing Tendency states that every human organism has an inherent desire or drive to reach out and utilize their own unique individual resources, traits and talents in a search to become more elaborated, complex, integrated and mature. That is a person over time naturally tends to grow to become more fully, uniquely and deeply themselves. In this regard Aristotle used the term "Entelechy" which is the unique form within the acorn which destines it to become an Oak.
Through the natural process of Self-Actualization persons tend to become more Creative, Unique, Authentic, Confident, Compassionate, Autonomous, More Comfortable With Solitude, More Comfortable With Intimacy, Accepting of Their Own Flaws and The Flaws of Others, Less Anxious and Less Defended. They crucially begin to evaluate their own worth internally, by their own standards and with self compassion. They move naturally away from the shaky position of relying on the positive regard of others as a source of self-esteem.
"Daydream Believer" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly.
Part Of The Inner Space Series. Daydream Believer is a Digital Collage which is struck by flashes of creative insight whilst tumbling through the heady clouds of a Daydream. Daydreaming, once an activity much maligned as a feckless lack of concentration and focus, has in recent research been shown to play key roles in the integration of new knowledge, the promotion of fluid intelligence, processing personal memories, identity formation and problem solving through the emergence of novel ideas. When the mind is not focusing on the outside world or engaged in task oriented thinking, the brain instead switches its activity to suite of regions known as the Default Mode Network (DMN). Daydreaming and Mindwandering are trademark activities of the DMN's neural processing style of Spontaneous Associative Thinking.
When we are engaged in this mode of processing instead of focusing on outside tasks, the mind joins loosely related dots, dots that we had not previously considered to be dots and that thing over there that’s not a dot, but let’s get it in the mix anyway. In this way we can generate new perspectives, contexts, narratives and meanings, finding ourselves suddenly struck by our most wonderful 'Eureka' moments of inspiration, whilst singing in the shower, casually sitting on a bus, getting out for a run or just pottering around the house. Daydreaming is indeed important work.
"A Ministry For Loneliness" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part Of The Inner Space Series. A Ministry For Loneliness is a Digital Collage which resides in solitude and with a dull ache at its core. For all of modern technologies promises of greater connectedness and access to wider digital communities, our society is undergoing a profound epidemic of isolation and loneliness. As we retreat further behind our screens, our real world communities fragment as we leave genuine human connection further and further behind. Loneliness is an emotional state arising from a loss of connection with others; it can be experienced just as readily in a crowd as when we are isolated. Loneliness is an adverse state, which as social beings inspires us to reconnect with others, to seek out and re-join the tribe as it were. If we are unable to bridge that gap, long periods of loneliness can have detrimental impacts on our physical health. Being indicated for greater risks of cardiovascular disease, dementia, depression and anxiety. In fact just this year Britain appointed its first Minister For Loneliness to combat the problem.
The distinction between Loneliness and being Alone is an important one. The desire to be comfortably Alone is in fact an indicator of psychological and emotional health. It is our own time spent, doing our own things, dreaming our own dreams, reading a book, dancing to a favourite song, or just sitting with ourselves and being comfortable in our own skin, without depending on the input of another. Unfortunately due to circumstances whether they are internal or external, sometimes what’s missing is the choice. Keep on bridging those gaps!
"The Hollow Man" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. The Hollow Man is a Digital Collage which is lost, listless and experiencing Anhedonia while in the teeth of a profound Depression. The word Anhedonia comes from Greek and means 'The Absence of Pleasure'. It can be a major component of suffering through the darkness of a deep Depression. When profoundly Depressed, the reach of Anhedonia extends far beyond an absence of pleasure, so that all feeling, satisfaction and meaning can be bleached out of life. Things which once brought joy are rendered inert and feel pointless. It leaves a behind a grey waste and an empty heart.
As painful as Depression might be to suffer through it can often be a call for us to effect profound and positive change in our lives. It slows us down, It draws us deeper into ourselves and our experiences, It causes us to take stock, It helps us honour that which was important, that we have lost and cannot get back, It helps us rediscover the things in our lives which are missing. There is no doubt that Depression is a painful, dark and difficult course to stay, it requires great patience, careful attention and whatever self compassion can be mustered. But when the day finally does break, It will break on new growth, fresh meaning, greater understandings and stronger connections.
"The Unreality Affect" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part Of The Inner Space Series. The Unreality Affect is a Digital Collage which views both itself and the surrounding world through the numbed and detached lenses of Depersonalization and Derealization. During times of severe trauma, stress and anxiety our minds can shield themselves from emotional overwhelm by dissociating and creating degrees of separation from both our sense of self and our sense of reality. Depersonalization and Derealization are natural defensive measures which kick in once our Fight or Flight Responses have been overpowered or have failed to remove us from either real or imagined danger. Whilst they can sometimes be highly unpleasant experiences in and of themselves, They do lessen the immediate sense of fear and conserve vital energy while allowing us to function in times of extreme emotional distress.
Depersonalization can carry the sensation that it is our self that is no longer real, our words and actions may seem automated and beyond our control; we may also feel as if we are watching ourselves from a distance or as if in a movie. Derealization carries a sensation that it is our external reality that is out of tune and out of kilter; Familiar spaces can seem strange and somewhat unrecognisable, Our perception of time may be distorted, sounds are too loud or muffled and a general lack of realness/concreteness is pervading throughout our experience.
"A Tangled Mass" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. A Tangled Mass is a Digital Collage which works its fingers to the bone in an attempt to unpick the various strands of its inner world. In life we are inundated a vast array of experiences, interactions and relationships of all flavours and kinds. Each of these creates an internal response, sometimes miniscule, sometimes overwhelming. Memories are formed, imprinted with emotional meanings and rationalized contexts. These memories can influence our responses to future experiences, as our future experiences can also alter our relationships with our previous memories. We all live with our own dynamic, ever changing inner worlds. In this place cause and effect are rarely seen as a straight line, instead experiences hang together like constellations in the night sky, change in one effects the configuration of all of the others.
So when we are blind to the effect an experience has had on us, either through our own defence mechanisms or because of traumatized memory, we can no longer see how its gravity has altered the complex constellations of our inner world. We may then become tangled up in the dark, unable to find that awkward knot which is binding us and keeping us stuck. As always, with patience, honesty and self-reflection we can catch a hold of that elusive thread and tease apart those invisible ligatures that keep us in that darkness.
"Golden Resplendent Awe" (2018) - Digital Collage - Anthony D Kelly
Part of The Inner Space Series. Resplendent Awe is a Digital Collage which basks in the nature of existence. Awe is a powerful and mixed emotion which encompasses elements of amazement, respect, wonder, reverence, deep connectedness, surprise, fear and dread. It typically emerges when we come into contact with something so vast, sublime, beautiful, powerful or destructive that it defies our comprehension; This in turn causes us to fundamentally alter our internal frames of reference, our perceptions of reality, and of ourselves to accommodate what we have experienced.
Sites of great natural beauty, profound total absorption in great music, works of art, witnessing powerful natural disasters/events, demonstrations of weapons of terrible magnitude, staring at the night sky and being hit by the vastness of it all, or suddenly becoming aware that everyone around you has a life as deep as rich and complex as your own (Sonder). These experiences all provide us with brief glimpses of the ineffable depth and complexity of existence evoking powerful feelings of Awe.